Bill Barr: I have a few announcements to make….

The President and I have come to some agreements, and disagreements, in the past and currently.

Firstly, we have decided to eat anything we want, and in any quantity we see fit.

While the President and I disagree on some of the fundamentals, such as…

He drinks massive numbers of Diet Cokes, while I am a Coke Classic guy. On the massive numbers each of us consume, we both agree, more is better.

  • We both agree, a diet consisting of mostly fried foods is perfectly fine, and again quantity is important.
  • We also agree that physical appearance is overrated for men. Once you reach a certain level of power, we both feel that a body resembling a gelatinous mound blubber, is perfectly acceptable, in fact, in our circle of friends, it is admired.
  • But, on the subject of hair styles, again we disagree. I prefer the grade school boy cut, he relies on a mathematical calculation involving single strands of hair, circled in ever widening arcs and ending up with a generous dollop of what I can only describe as an epoxy based concoction. So see, we do have differences.
  • Now on to tailoring. While I prefer morbid shades of black and grey in a 56 Short. The President prefers the billowing sail cloth bathed in indigo blue, fashioned into a, shall I say comfortable, no let’s just call that thing what it is “circus tentish” sheik.
  • I would like to continue add to this list, but it is time for my mid morning, after breakfast, after breakfast snack, before my upcoming lunch, feeding. It’s important to stay punctual.
  • I do have a few more nuggets (don’t touch my nuggets!) to share about the way we think about the DOJ, but really, it doesn’t matter what you think. I am right!